Balance: \ˈba-lən(t)s\ noun- an aesthetically pleasing integration of elements; mental and emotional steadiness; a state of equilibrium.
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Life is a balancing act. I know that, you know that, we all know that. But knowing is completely different from doing. I KNOW I should prioritize. I KNOW I should do A and B before I get to C, but most days, I just want C.
I have two kinds of days. I have days when I'm completely overwhelmed with all I have to do; and I have days when I'm underwhelmed and feel like there's nothing to do. (and trust me, while the latter sounds nice in theory, it's really not)
My everyday life is pretty busy. I have certain obligations that I have to take care of. (obligations=children) but I struggle with feelings of guilt, and depression, and confidence. There's no way I can do everything that is expected of me. And if I were to give into the world's view of a perfect mom, I'd have even more things to feel guilty about.
Balancing "life" is something I struggle with. I have a constant internal debate about whether or not I'm spending enough time with my kids. Am I spending enough time on my husband? Am I spending enough time on me? Am I spending too much time on me? Is my house clean enough, are my children nice enough, are they happy enough?
The debate is endless. I have a hard time achieving the balance that my life needs. I have days when I'm completely overwhelmed with all I have to do. Doctor's appointments, dental appointments, playdates... and I don't foresee it getting LESS busy as my kids get older. No, I think it's going to get busiER. Oh my life, school buses? school events? PTA? GAH! what's a woman to do?
So I've been trying to get together a game plan of how I'm going to balance life. My list? long. giant. horrendous. enormous. HUGE.
And I've gone over and over it. I've edited it. I've taken out "extras" and edited out the unnecessary things. But it's still approximately 87 miles long. and I struggle.
I struggle with the guilt of spending time on the computer instead of outside with my children. I struggle with the guilt of cleaning the house instead of taking them to the park. I worry that I don't put them first, but then I think, of course I put them first! But that little voice in the back of my head says, "really? you think so?"
I believe that there are a top three when it comes to priorities. Me, my family, and the Lord. I have obligations to all these people. So, how do I make the time? Where does the balance come in? I firmly believe that if I put the Lord first, that everything else will be taken care of.
So, why haven't I been doing it? Why haven't I been putting Him first?
I know I should read the scriptures everyday. I know that we should have family scripture study time. I should be teaching my children how to be like Jesus by example, not just with words. And if I'm the example, how well am I doing?
I admit, we don't get family scripture time in every day. Sometimes, it's all we can do to make it to church on Sunday. We have Family Home Evening every week. We have family prayer, but in this day and age, is it enough?
(It's now time for the cheesy cliched analogy...) I can't stand still. When I think I have everything under control, when I start getting too sure of myself, that's when life knocks me on my rear. I need to remember to keep moving forward. To keep striving for balance. I'll never have it if I am just complacent.
I have two kinds of days. I have days when I'm completely overwhelmed with all I have to do; and I have days when I'm underwhelmed and feel like there's nothing to do. (and trust me, while the latter sounds nice in theory, it's really not)
My everyday life is pretty busy. I have certain obligations that I have to take care of. (obligations=children) but I struggle with feelings of guilt, and depression, and confidence. There's no way I can do everything that is expected of me. And if I were to give into the world's view of a perfect mom, I'd have even more things to feel guilty about.
Balancing "life" is something I struggle with. I have a constant internal debate about whether or not I'm spending enough time with my kids. Am I spending enough time on my husband? Am I spending enough time on me? Am I spending too much time on me? Is my house clean enough, are my children nice enough, are they happy enough?
The debate is endless. I have a hard time achieving the balance that my life needs. I have days when I'm completely overwhelmed with all I have to do. Doctor's appointments, dental appointments, playdates... and I don't foresee it getting LESS busy as my kids get older. No, I think it's going to get busiER. Oh my life, school buses? school events? PTA? GAH! what's a woman to do?
So I've been trying to get together a game plan of how I'm going to balance life. My list? long. giant. horrendous. enormous. HUGE.
And I've gone over and over it. I've edited it. I've taken out "extras" and edited out the unnecessary things. But it's still approximately 87 miles long. and I struggle.
I struggle with the guilt of spending time on the computer instead of outside with my children. I struggle with the guilt of cleaning the house instead of taking them to the park. I worry that I don't put them first, but then I think, of course I put them first! But that little voice in the back of my head says, "really? you think so?"
I believe that there are a top three when it comes to priorities. Me, my family, and the Lord. I have obligations to all these people. So, how do I make the time? Where does the balance come in? I firmly believe that if I put the Lord first, that everything else will be taken care of.
So, why haven't I been doing it? Why haven't I been putting Him first?
I know I should read the scriptures everyday. I know that we should have family scripture study time. I should be teaching my children how to be like Jesus by example, not just with words. And if I'm the example, how well am I doing?
I admit, we don't get family scripture time in every day. Sometimes, it's all we can do to make it to church on Sunday. We have Family Home Evening every week. We have family prayer, but in this day and age, is it enough?
(It's now time for the cheesy cliched analogy...) I can't stand still. When I think I have everything under control, when I start getting too sure of myself, that's when life knocks me on my rear. I need to remember to keep moving forward. To keep striving for balance. I'll never have it if I am just complacent.
