Dear MMB:
I have a question about Feminism. What do you think about it? Is it really that hairy-legged-Birkenstock-wearing-tree-hugging-man-hater that's hiding in the bushes to steal your bra and burn it? I'm so confused. I want to know what other MMB-ers think about Feminism. Is it possible to post a Dear MMB on this subject? I just want to know what people really think.
Please don't use my real name with this if you choose to post it. I really appreciate everything you are doing for the LDS blogging community, and I respect the opinions of you and your readers.
Thanks in advance,
~Mabel *not her real name*
Well, well, well. {cracks knuckles} I think I'm going to take this one on because I've been actively arguing this a lot lately.
People seem to think that feminism means women should be able to do whatever they want, whenever they want, however they want. They want to be equal to men. They want to make the same amount of money. They want everything RIGHT! NOW! DANGIT! So I'm going to let you all in on a little secret.
A) That's not exactly what it means and
B) That's just not how it works.
B) That's just not how it works.
Yes, we have made great strides in the last century pertaining to women's rights. We can vote. We can go to school. We can provide for ourselves and our families. We, hopefully, are getting the same pay, and have access to the same promotions. All of those things are great and noble. We are very lucky to live in a time like this, where we get to have options.
But the part I want to focus on today, mostly because this IS Mormon Mommy Blogs, is the mommy aspect of the feminist movement.
When it comes to motherhood, our strongest opposition is other women.
How many times have we read about the debate between working moms and stay at home moms? How many times have we been told that what we do doesn't really "count"? How many of us have been ostracized, or spoken down to, or otherwise admonished because of our decision to fulfill that divine role of wife and mother?
I know I have.
I also know that it has never been a man that has said, "Oh, you mean you just stay home all day? You don't DO anything?"
Nope, that slap in the face up there has always come from another woman. A woman that was better than me because she had a real job and she made real money.
Let me be very clear, I am a feminist in the strongest sense of the word. Women are powerful. Women are amazing. Women. Are. Feminine.
We have amazing abilities. Beyond creating life, which is more deeply spiritual than many realize, we have the ability to love, to have compassion, to multitask.
We also are our hardest critics. Handing out unwarranted criticisms for the slightest offense. Taking to heart the smallest things and letting them tear us down.
But what does it mean to me personally? It means that I made a choice. I made a choice to close my successful business because I wanted to stay home. I made a choice when I woke up this morning to do it with a smile on my face and a song in my heart. I made a choice when I kissed my husband goodbye and thanked him for providing for us. I made the choice and I stand firmly behind it. This is what I want to do. This is where I want to be. Sure, the pay is lousy, but I wouldn't trade it for anything else in the world.
Simply put, to me, feminism is whatever validates and inspires womanhood.
